The Perfect Heart

I first heard this story as a teenager, but it has stayed with me all these years. I hope others can feel encouragement from this as much as I have.

To Min Yoon Gi, I’ve been surrounded by artists all my life, so I understand how difficult it is to produce a piece of art from within you. Every painting, verse, or musical note that is produced is an extension of the artist. Many times, the very soul of the artist is exposed, and they are left vulnerable to attacks from others. How difficult it must be for you to give out a piece of you in every song you make. Yet with every piece of your heart that you give away, another will always be given back to you to fill the space. I believe that the more pieces of our heart we give away, the more space we create to receive love and to love. I hope this story gives you comfort evertime your heart aches.

Happy birthday Suga!

Author Unknown

One day a young man was standing in the middle of the town proclaiming that he had the most beautiful heart in the whole valley. A large crowd gathered and they all admired his heart, for it was perfect. There was not a mark or a flaw in it. Yes, they all agreed it truly was the most beautiful heart they had ever seen. The young man was very proud and boasted more loudly about his beautiful heart.

Suddenly, an old man appeared at the front of the crowd and said “Why your heart is not nearly as beautiful as mine.” The crowd and the young man looked at the old man’s heart. It was beating strongly, but full of scars, it had places where pieces had been removed and other pieces put in, but they didn’t fit quite right and there were several jagged edges. In fact, in some places there were deep gouges where whole pieces were missing.

The people stared – how can he say his heart is more beautiful, they thought? The young man looked at the old man’s heart, saw its state, and laughed. “You must be joking,” he said. “Compare your heart with mine, mine is perfect and yours is a mess of scars and tears.”

“Yes,” said the old man, “Yours is perfect looking but I would never trade with you. You see, every scar represents a person to whom I have given my love. I tear out a piece of my heart and give it to them, and often they give me a piece of their heart which fits into the empty place in my heart, but because the pieces aren’t exact, I have some rough edges, which I cherish, because they remind me of the love we shared. Sometimes I have given pieces of my heart away, and the other person hasn’t returned a piece of his heart to me. These are the empty gouges — giving love is taking a chance.

Although these gouges are painful, they stay open, reminding me of the love I have for these people too, and I hope someday they may return and fill the space I have waiting. So now do you see what true beauty is?”

The young man stood silently with tears running down his cheeks. He walked up to the old man, reached into his perfect young and beautiful heart, and ripped a piece out. He offered it to the old man with trembling hands. The old man took his offering, placed it in his heart and then took a piece from his old scarred heart and placed it in the wound in the young man’s heart. It fit, but not perfectly, as there were some jagged edges.

The young man looked at his heart, not perfect anymore but more beautiful than ever, since love from the old man’s heart flowed into his. They embraced and walked away side by side.

Wedding Day

“She looks like an angel.”

Those were the very words I thought of as I saw a glimpse of you through the bedroom window. Beautiful, with a soft smile on your radiant face, as you sat on your bed talking to your best friend. I knew I wasn’t supposed to look in, but I could not help it. You were captivating.

There was a glow about you that surrounded you and brightened the room. I know you’ll just say it was the sun, but it wasn’t. You were like a shining beacon, beckoning to people that they can’t help but look at you. I could not stop looking.

I am not one to pay attention to detail, but I noticed everything about you that day. The way your hair, normally in a messy bun or a ponytail, fell around your face. Soft curls that highlighted your face and those big brown eyes. The same eyes I gazed into last night as we sat around the table, talking and laughing about this day.  Memories run through my head as I recalled every moment we spent together from childhood. We spent hours together, and it was so effortless on my part for me to fall in love with my best friend. I have never stopped loving you, even up to this day, but I could never tell you.

Your dress suited you. White looks good on you; but then again, everything suits you anyway. Countless hours spent on finding that perfect dress. Let me just say, it was worth it. “Off the shoulder,” so your best friend told me. She said it suited you best, and she was right.

You’ve always been a natural beauty. I’m glad that girl did not put too much makeup on your face. You don’t need it. You’re perfect the way you are.

You catch me staring at you, and you wave, smiling and looking so happy. You told me to go in, and like a sailor to a siren, I did. I could see how excited you are, and I reached down to hug you. I tell you how beautiful you look, and you swat me because I’m making you cry and it’s ruining your makeup. I tell you it’s ok, you’re still beautiful anyway. I knew at that moment I had to tell you what I felt all this time. I take a deep breath, and with every fiber of my being, I look at you and I finally tell you I love you, for the first time. You stop, look at me straight in the eye, and say, “I know. I’ve always known you did. Thank you for doing so.”

You gave me a hug, and with tears in both of our eyes, I left to go to the next room. My brother was there, in his suit and tie, looking so happy and in love. “Congratulations bro,” I said. “Your bride looks beautiful.”

My Korean Icon Contest

Being a foodie, every time I visit a country, I always, always check out the local cuisine. So the first thing that comes to mind when I hear “Korea” would be the food!

My neighborhood is known around the metro for being a food lover’s haven. Once an exclusive, quiet village, many homes have now been converted into commercial spaces, and boasts of a variety of cuisines from all over the world.

One of my favorite spots is a nondescript Korean hole in the wall named HANA. It basically has about 7 tables, and can probably fit a maximum of 20 people inside. But the food is so good and surprisingly cheap! My sister was the one who introduced me to this place, and I tell you, they have the best Bibimbap, Bulgogi, and, of course, Tteokbokki.

Ironically, I have never been a fan of spicy food. When I was younger, I literally could not eat anything with even just a hint of spice. But I guess years of exposure to it (my dad and sisters LOVE spicy food) have opened my senses, and I’m pleased to share that I can now eat them, up to a certain extent.

The tteokbokki is no exception. Literally, it means “stir-fried rice cake,” and is basically composed of sliced rice cakes sautéed in red pepper paste with spring onions and garlic. It is extremely spicy for my taste, and I have to eat it with a lot of rice just to overcome the spiciness. Rice cake with rice, how Filipino of me!

Interestingly enough, this famous Korean street food was not spicy at all when it was first served. It was rather brown and quite plain, and was once part of the Korean Royal Court Cuisine. It was radically changed after the Korean War because of the introduction of gochujang, a spicy paste made of chili peppers, and became a Korean staple food sold from street carts (pojangmacha).

I once watched a Korean variety show where an idol group was having an interview out in the streets, and they decided to have some tteokbokki from a pojangmacha. One of the members mentioned that it’s been a while since they were able to have that on the street since, as celebrities, they did not get to go out as much as they wanted. It reminded him of how life was before they debuted, and evoked a lot of good memories.

I find it interesting how food can be associated with certain feelings and emotions. I am Filipino, born and raised in Metro Manila, and in recent years, I’ve realized how highly revolved around food our culture is. Celebrations and tragic situations alike are observed with heaping servings of various dishes. Weddings, birthdays, engagements and other happy events are celebrated worldwide with food, but I have yet to hear about wakes or funerals that are professionally catered in other countries.

But the beauty of food is that it is a universal language. Ice cream can be understood anywhere in the world, whether it be to get over a breakup, or simply to just feel better on a hot summer day. Chocolates can mean “I like you,” or “I’m sorry,” depending on the situation. And then there are the dishes that simply remind you of home, and make you remember your roots.

For some, like the idol, tteokbokki is a reminder of his childhood, and the carefree memories that are associated along with it. For others, it can be a lifesaver, a few thousand won difference between being hungry or not, and for a jobless person, that is a big thing. It can also be a story of how a man and a woman met over a steaming serving of tteokbokki, or it can be a story of a young man’s home, of how his Umma used to prepare the dish for him before he left to work in another city.

As the famous writer and poet Oscar Wilde said, “Memory is the diary we all carry about with us.” Our memories are the small entries we wrote in our heads, the little snapshots of life best left preserved. And when associated with food, it is a lot easier to access that cache that we keep inside our heads.

What once was an exclusive dish for Korean Royalty, the tteokbokki has now become a part of everyday life. It is no longer just a popular Korean street food. For many, the tteokbokki literally is, is a slice of life.

Taken from Google Images

*Written as an entry for the “My Korean Icon” Contest of the  Korea Tourism Organization Manila Office. For more information please go to their Facebook page here.

First Love

For the past week, I’ve been watching movies and shows that seem to revolve around this main theme. Not that I chose to watch it for the theme! It was just after two movies and one show did I realize that they all had something in common.

The first movie I watched was Whisper of the Heart by Studio Ghibli. I just felt like watching one of his works, but I wanted one with a happy, known ending. (Unlike some of his movies that have an open ending.) Watching it brought me back to my childhood, a time when I didn’t know what I wanted to pursue. I had so many dreams, but I didn’t know yet what I really wanted to be. All I knew was, even that young, I wanted to have someone by my side to share things with. Like the characters of the movie, I innocently wanted my first love to be my one and only. But God had other plans for me. 🙂 

 

Watch the trailer here.

 

The second movie I watched was a Korean movie entitled A Millionaire’s First Love. It’s obvious from the title what it was about, but, again, I didn’t intend to watch it because of the theme. I saw it on my movie list, and I wasn’t sure if I’ve watched it already, so I did. And realised I had already watched it, but decided to continue anyway. The synopsis, taken from Asian Wiki, is: 

Jae-Kyung (Hyun-Bin ) is a high school senior, who skips school often. Once he turns nineteen years old, he is going to be a millionaire. However, the day before he is set to inherit his fortune, their family lawyer informs Jae-Kyung about the will from his deceased grandfather. His grandfather specified that Jae-Kyung can only inherit his fortune if he graduates from Boram High School, which is located in the countryside. He has no choice but to transfer there.

Life changes a lot for him at Boram High School. He can’t use his credit card or drive his sports car. Meanwhile, Jae-Kyung meets Eun-Hwan (Lee Yeon-Hee). She’s different from the other people living there and seems to harbor some kind of secret. Jae-Kyung’s attitude begins to change and Eun-Hwan is about to reveal her secret.

This movie reminded me that sometimes, we put value on things we should not. We should remember that love is, truly, priceless. That we should value people who love us, and if we love them in return, to treasure that love. 

Watch the trailer here.

Now, I have something to admit. I am actually a big, big fan of SHINee. And because of that, I watched the new Korean series Dating Agency: Cyrano. Lee Taemin guest stars in Episodes 3-5, and his episodes were entitled: An Idol’s First Love. 

In the series, Cyrano “agents” help their clients win the love of their lives, using covert operations and sophisticated equipment to get the job done. In this case, a high school idol, Ray, falls in love with a classmate, but she is in love with someone else, who happens to be his friend and a member of Cyrano. What happens in the story is both heart breaking and kilig inducing! For full English Subbed episodes, head on over to DramaCrazy.Net.

Maybe it’s because it’s been raining, but I can’t help but feel sentimental these days. It’s try what they say, “You’ll always remember your first love.” However, I think it’s best to say, “You may always remember your first love, but you must always treasure your last love.”

Songs for Cinema

When I want to de-stress, think and write, I like listening to music. And I can’t just listen to any type of music. I have to listen to cinema soundtracks. Like I mentioned in a previous post, cinema soundtracks allow my imagination to run wild, and I get more creative this way. I like getting lost in the emotions of the notes, and revel in the happy place the music takes me.

One of my ultra favorite composers is Jesse Chui. He has collaborated a lot with Wong Fu Productions, and has scored my favorite Wong Fu short films.

It’s weird. Everytime I listen to my favorite songs from his collection, I end up feeling… in love. 🙂 Funny, isn’t it? Kudos Jesse. I hope one day I can meet you!

You can find more of his music at http://songsforcinema.com/.

Love,

Jabba

Fate & Faith

I’ve been mulling over these two things the past few days. Is there really such a thing as fate? I’ve heard of stories of people meeting in unexpected places and in unexpected ways. How, had they been just a few minutes early or late, if they had turned left instead of right, they would not have met that person at all. How one can find his/her future mate in an unlikely place. A friend of mine actually met the man who became her husband in a line while waiting for a ride to go home.

Is it really just fate? Or is there also faith? I believe there are no accidents in life, and that everything has been planned accordingly by God. And yes, I do have faith that I will one day meet my fate. 🙂 Who knows? The next time I bump into someone, he’ll be THE ONE. 🙂

Tadhana (Fate)

Sa hindi inaaasahang pagtatagpo ng mga mundo

(In an unexpected meeting of [different] worlds)

May minsan lang na nagdugtong, damang dama na ang ugong nito

(There was a rare interconnection, and we can really feel its roar)

Di pa ba sapat ang sakit at lahat na hinding hindi ko ipararanas saýo

(Is it not enough that the pain and all, that I will never ever make you experience them)

Ibinubunyag ka ng iyong matang sumisigaw ng pag-sinta

(You are being divulged by your eyes that shouts of love)

Ba’t ‘di pa patulan ang pagsuyong nagkulang

(Why don’t you now fight for the love that fell short [or wasn’t enough])

Tayong umaasang hilaga’t kanluran

(We who hope [are] like [you] the east and [I] the west)

Ikaw ang hantungan at bilang kanlungan mo

(You are my destination, and as your shelter)

Ako ang sasagip sa’yo

(I’ll be the one to rescue you)

Saan nga ba patungo, nakayapak at nahihiwagaan

(Where am I headed, in bare feet, feeling an enchantment)

Ang bagyo ng tadhana ay dinadala ako sa init ng bisig mo

(The storms of fate, it carries me into the warmth of your arms)

Ba’t di pa sabihin ang hindi mo maamin

(Why don’t you now say the things [or feelings] that you can’t admit)

Ipauubaya na lang ba ‘to sa hangin

(Will you [it be] hand[ed] them over to [and carried by] the wind?)

‘Wag mong ikatakot ang bulong ng damdamin mo

(Don’t you fear the whispers of your heart)

Naririto ako’t nakikinig saýo

(I’m here and I am listening to you)

Hooohh… hooohh…

Hooohh… hooohh…

Hooohh… hooohh…

La la la la…

English translation by The Daywriter.

Taylor Swift sings my life

Funny how I can relate to a lot of Taylor Swift’s songs. It’s like she takes the words from my mind and makes them into songs! But I don’t realize that’s how I was feeling until she sang them.

Take Fifteen, for example. At fifteen years old, you viewed everything through rose colored glasses. You thought puppy love was the real thing, and not just hyperactive hormones. Not being allowed to go to a party was a matter of life and death, and so many other petty things were considered the end of the world.

Next song was White Horse.  Man, the realizations I had at that time hurt a lot! I had dreamt of a prince on a white horse. Unfortunately, he was just a lowly slave in the kingdom (Just kidding! Not bitter anymore. :p) Suffice to say, the outcome of that fairy tale shattered my pink glasses!

Then there’s Love Story. My friend made me realize that this is the sort of story I should have in my life. That when I meet a Romeo, he should have the guts to make things right with my family. Glad my story didn’t end with unhappily ever after!

Enchanted was a step closer to finding the hiding prince. This was how I felt when I met this person (goofy smile activate!). We’ve never met again, but I’m hoping that will change. One day. Dreams do come true right? 🙂

And now this. Not that I can relate, but I could have been able to relate to them before! I just like how “in your face” the lyrics are. hahaha!

I love you Taylor Swift! Thank you for singing my life. hehe. 😀

Lucky Guy

It’s been so long since I’ve met someone
That makes me feel this way
Makes me smile, and that’s hard to do
I don’t think it’s something you realize you do

You make me feel
Like I’m the only guy
With you in the world

But we can’t be together
Can’t really be friends
We can’t be lovers
And we can’t pretend
Oh that boy in your life
Better make you his wife
And he better believe he’s a lucky guy

You wanted a song well here’s one for you
Nobody will know except for us two
Don’t ask me about it
Cuz I won’t tell the truth
Just know that there’s someone
Thinking of you

You make me feel
Something I wish wasn’t real at all

[Chorus]

You were never mine to begin with…

So we can’t be together
Can’t really be friends
We can’t be lovers
And we can’t pretend
Oh that boy in your life
Better make you his wife
And he better believe he’s a lucky guy

Wong Fu Productions, you did it again. For a song with heartbreaking lyrics, you’ve managed to let my hopeless romantic side come out once more. Admittedly, it does not need much prodding for that side to come out, but i fully expected the MV to be as heartbreaking as the song, never considering the possibility that the story can come from the Lucky Guy! And so here I am again, left to ponder about how my own story will be, and dream about endless possibilities. 🙂

Thanks David, Phil, Ted and Wes.

Instagram

I am completely addicted to Instagram! These are just some of my favorite shots. 🙂

For more, please follow me on Instagram, username: @labellascarpa

Thanks! 🙂

Dear Future Husband

Dear _________,

I was reading a book the other day that I found in the book shop. The title was A Man Worth Waiting For, by Jackie Kendall. It was interesting for me because, that day, literally minutes before seeing the book, I actually wrote something about having to be a girl worth waiting for. Funny isn’t it, that I had wanted to be someone worth waiting for, and God shows me a book on how to look for a man worth waiting for.

It then proceeds to talk about how we should avoid Bozos, yet be on the lookout for Boazes. I feel like God is telling me something here, coz the story of Ruth has been speaking to me lately! It goes on to describe what a Boaz should be like, and hopefully, what you would be like.

In a nutshell, a Boaz is someone who’s honorable, respectful, kind, generous, a law abider, and most especially, he’s someone who’s willing to accept your “baggages.”

I am a bit weird, in a good way, I think. I have random outbursts of weirdness at times, like dancing when I like the food I’m eating, making funny faces because I feel like it, and I STILL love cartoons of all kinds.  I am also a guy’s worst nightmare when it comes to romance, because I absolutely love all the frills of being a hopeless romantic! I draw the line at extreme cheesiness though.

It would be fun to know what weird things we have in common. I think it will be nice if I find a fellow geek who can talk to me about everything and anything under the sun. I’m sure I’m gonna learn a lot from you.

Until then.

Yours,

Jabba